Whether you’re in your own bed or someone else’s, the night can be completely ruined by a bad mattress. There’s more to comfort than the partner you’re with, though. Do what makes you feel the most comfortable, even if that means going home alone. The key to a successful one-night stand is being aware of the risks, taking precautions, and, most importantly, following your gut. Lying down with strangers was the most worrisome for women, but co-workers and friends raised alarm bells for men. The possibility of STDs, the threat to personal safety, and resulting judgment from others (or yourself) are all part of the package. One-night stands can range from nerve-wracking and awkward to fun and liberating, but even the most comfortable encounters come with risk. The smaller difference in the number of one-night stands between the genders when shame was less of a factor suggests the feeling plays a slightly bigger role for women than men when it comes to hookups. Men with high shame had an average of about 11 one-night stands over their lifetime, while women with high shame had an average of 8.4. Each gender with low shame had about 16 one-night stands in their lifetime on average.įor those with high shame, however, the genders differ slightly. Regardless of its origin, shame plays a major role in how people approach, participate, and feel about one-night stands.īoth men and women who had low shame according to the Shame-Negative-Self-Evaluation sub-scale of the Guilt and Shame Proneness Scale had more one-night stands, on average, compared to those with high shame. While this shame can come from oneself, it also stems from the judgment of others. Stranger DangerĬasual sex and one-night stands are often linked to shame, usually more so for women than men. Thirty-two percent of women worried about personal safety enough to bring protection, while only 11 percent of men entered a one-night stand carrying self-defense protection. Women were also more than twice as likely to carry self-defense items with them. The fear women feel when alone in certain situations is shared among the gender, so leaning on girlfriends may be the best bet – especially since they can empathize with those worries. Letting a friend know your whereabouts matches the sentiment of “text me when you get home,” and it goes much deeper than just personal safety. Fifty-five percent of women said they told a friend where they would be, while only 23 percent of men did the same. However, the genders differed greatly when it came to other precautions. The two genders were also just as likely to ask their casual partner about his or her STI status before getting it on. What steps are people taking to relieve the worries they have surrounding one-nighters? Both men and women practiced carrying extra condoms or contraceptives with them at 55.7 percent and 55.5 percent, respectively. Luckily, taking precautions can minimize certain concerns associated with one-night stands. It’s difficult to prevent judgment, labels, or anxiety from creeping in during one-night stands. As women continue to come together and reclaim their independence and agency, the gap between comfort felt by men and women regarding casual sex may begin to close. But as time progressed, women have begun to find their voice and express themselves through the #MeToo movement and the Women’s March, letting the world know there is nothing wrong with their sexuality or being a woman – and that the two are not mutually exclusive. With a long history of being shamed for sex, women began to mute their sexuality and fit the mold society saw fit. The biggest difference between men and women was those rating their comfort level as “extremely comfortable.” Twenty-eight percent of men had no doubts about casual sex, but only 16.2 percent of women felt the same. The majority of respondents were moderately comfortable with one-night stands. Most respondents were at least slightly comfortable with one-night stands, with only 2.7 percent of women and 1.6 percent of men reporting they were not at all comfortable with the idea. For some, one-night stands are fun and lighthearted, but other people may not be as comfortable with them.
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